Meditation isn't for everyone. Some people experience adverse affects, OP. You're not the only one. It can destabilize people. Also, meditation is not to be used as a substitute for mental health care. Panic attacks and depression are serious matters.
There are psychotherapists out there, who can help you overcome those issues naturally, without medication, but it's a challenge to find them. Depending on how serious your symptoms are, they may recommend going on medication temporarily, while undergoing therapy. I have seen people heal to the point of not needing their meds anymore, but it takes time, and it takes effort on your part, and a good therapist.
It sounds like the effect of the meditation was to cause some kind of depersonalization. Check your health insurance policy to see if it covers mental health care, and look for a good professional to help you. These are serious afflictions you have. You should take care of yourself, the same way that you go to a doctor, when you are sick. You can't fix these things on your own.
Good luck!
There are psychotherapists out there, who can help you overcome those issues naturally, without medication, but it's a challenge to find them. Depending on how serious your symptoms are, they may recommend going on medication temporarily, while undergoing therapy. I have seen people heal to the point of not needing their meds anymore, but it takes time, and it takes effort on your part, and a good therapist.
It sounds like the effect of the meditation was to cause some kind of depersonalization. Check your health insurance policy to see if it covers mental health care, and look for a good professional to help you. These are serious afflictions you have. You should take care of yourself, the same way that you go to a doctor, when you are sick. You can't fix these things on your own.
Good luck!