Hey Coody,
I really, totally and fully understand all you are saying! It is totally outrageous and as you can see RealLove is clearly NOT life coaching at all. It is a cult organisation using thought-reform techniques to alter people's thoughts and behaviours. RealLove is really quite evil and not loving by any stretch of the imagination.
I don't think that the UK version run by couple Pete and Nikki Uglow is actually closed down at all. I think that they have gone underground for a while to re-invent themselves, change stuff, cross the T's and dot the I's and maybe rewrite their charity status and hide some of the underhanded stuff they have been doing - as well as try to get more money to keep it going. They may break off from Greg Baer, as others close to Greg have done, and run an organisation of their own but entirely based on Greg's principles. It will still be a trade of "we'll sell you unconditional love for money". That will never change. We also must remember that Pete Uglow is a former policeman and there are active members within this organisation too.
I can see that when your husband was made a 'wise man' that this was the point you had totally lost him. People only get given this status when they are completely absorbed in RealLove and eat, sleep, drink, eat and think RealLove 24 hours a day. They like to draw in people who are in respectable jobs in which the public see them as decent and sane individuals (Doctors, Academics, Police, Healthcare, Lawyers, etc.) because this stops people from doubting what they are getting into. Greg wrote RealLove from a foundation of his Mormon religion - so it is no surprise that when people are told to 'go and find a religion' at some point in their RealLove Journey, that they will be just a little nudged towards Mormonism because "It aligns more closely with the RealLove principles". However, a coaching program is only a passing thing in our life, a short course to help us improve an aspect of our life, so why would anyone join a religion based upon the principles of a coaching program? That's because it's not a coaching program and people don't end up leaving.
Coody, there is another thread on the message board about RealLove, it is in the thread called 'Large Group Awareness Training: Human Potential' and you will see that there are others just like you with the same problem. Another member has posted an array of book reviews from Amazon about Greg's books too. Please also remember that the Dr part of Greg's title refers to him being a former eye surgeon - that's all. He read books on psychology and religions, and attended various 12 step and other programs as well as counselling and hypnotherapy etc and just developed his own RealLove program as he thought that nothing had helped him to recover from being an alcoholic, drug addict (who nearly killed patients during surgery). So he is not qualified in mental health practice - and neither are any of the coaches. No one is licenced to do this type of psychotherapy work - although they say that they are not doing this. Truth is, they ARE doing exactly that. Greg is not an expert in anything except his own sinister program - don't let the MD fool you!!
I am in the process of reading 4 major books on Cults, and so far everything I have read in the first two books shows that RealLove is 100% a cult organisation. I thought I was going crazy at one stage as I was being pulled in to all of this, but thankfully my gut instinct protected me and I didn't allow myself to pulled in any deeper than I was. It just didn't feel right or look right. You cannot challenge or question anything about RealLove or Greg without people walking away from you.
Just remember, what has happened is not about you. Greg has told everyone that only he and RealLove have proper unconditional love and that you have to go through them to get it. All the theories he proposes are contradictory and pain everyone not doing RealLove as being toxic, negative and giving love 'conditionally' (apparently when outsiders give love it is to get something and not real - only the love given by RealLove people is real). Your husband believes he has been saved. But remember, he has been subjected to a slow process of brainwashing called 'thought-reform', to being 'love-bombed' by people in Real Love and in the Mormon church (boy are the Mormons good at love bombing!). He will have been subjected to other forms of brainwashing without realising and will have become dependent over time on RealLove from his new daddy and mummy rather than the 'real' 'love' of the real world. He will hold within any stress or anxiety about people, situations, events etc that happen in his life, pushing the people who love him away, and saving it all up for a Group session, or visiting daddy, so he can be held and nursed like a little baby. It all sounds and 'is' totally bizarre, but not to the people doing RealLove. They are just led to believe that everyone else not doing RealLove are the crazy one's.
I am not sure what any of us can do to about exposing this organisation for what it truly is. How does one get a cult organisation out into the open so it can be publicly, professionally and openly scrutinised?
I really, totally and fully understand all you are saying! It is totally outrageous and as you can see RealLove is clearly NOT life coaching at all. It is a cult organisation using thought-reform techniques to alter people's thoughts and behaviours. RealLove is really quite evil and not loving by any stretch of the imagination.
I don't think that the UK version run by couple Pete and Nikki Uglow is actually closed down at all. I think that they have gone underground for a while to re-invent themselves, change stuff, cross the T's and dot the I's and maybe rewrite their charity status and hide some of the underhanded stuff they have been doing - as well as try to get more money to keep it going. They may break off from Greg Baer, as others close to Greg have done, and run an organisation of their own but entirely based on Greg's principles. It will still be a trade of "we'll sell you unconditional love for money". That will never change. We also must remember that Pete Uglow is a former policeman and there are active members within this organisation too.
I can see that when your husband was made a 'wise man' that this was the point you had totally lost him. People only get given this status when they are completely absorbed in RealLove and eat, sleep, drink, eat and think RealLove 24 hours a day. They like to draw in people who are in respectable jobs in which the public see them as decent and sane individuals (Doctors, Academics, Police, Healthcare, Lawyers, etc.) because this stops people from doubting what they are getting into. Greg wrote RealLove from a foundation of his Mormon religion - so it is no surprise that when people are told to 'go and find a religion' at some point in their RealLove Journey, that they will be just a little nudged towards Mormonism because "It aligns more closely with the RealLove principles". However, a coaching program is only a passing thing in our life, a short course to help us improve an aspect of our life, so why would anyone join a religion based upon the principles of a coaching program? That's because it's not a coaching program and people don't end up leaving.
Coody, there is another thread on the message board about RealLove, it is in the thread called 'Large Group Awareness Training: Human Potential' and you will see that there are others just like you with the same problem. Another member has posted an array of book reviews from Amazon about Greg's books too. Please also remember that the Dr part of Greg's title refers to him being a former eye surgeon - that's all. He read books on psychology and religions, and attended various 12 step and other programs as well as counselling and hypnotherapy etc and just developed his own RealLove program as he thought that nothing had helped him to recover from being an alcoholic, drug addict (who nearly killed patients during surgery). So he is not qualified in mental health practice - and neither are any of the coaches. No one is licenced to do this type of psychotherapy work - although they say that they are not doing this. Truth is, they ARE doing exactly that. Greg is not an expert in anything except his own sinister program - don't let the MD fool you!!
I am in the process of reading 4 major books on Cults, and so far everything I have read in the first two books shows that RealLove is 100% a cult organisation. I thought I was going crazy at one stage as I was being pulled in to all of this, but thankfully my gut instinct protected me and I didn't allow myself to pulled in any deeper than I was. It just didn't feel right or look right. You cannot challenge or question anything about RealLove or Greg without people walking away from you.
Just remember, what has happened is not about you. Greg has told everyone that only he and RealLove have proper unconditional love and that you have to go through them to get it. All the theories he proposes are contradictory and pain everyone not doing RealLove as being toxic, negative and giving love 'conditionally' (apparently when outsiders give love it is to get something and not real - only the love given by RealLove people is real). Your husband believes he has been saved. But remember, he has been subjected to a slow process of brainwashing called 'thought-reform', to being 'love-bombed' by people in Real Love and in the Mormon church (boy are the Mormons good at love bombing!). He will have been subjected to other forms of brainwashing without realising and will have become dependent over time on RealLove from his new daddy and mummy rather than the 'real' 'love' of the real world. He will hold within any stress or anxiety about people, situations, events etc that happen in his life, pushing the people who love him away, and saving it all up for a Group session, or visiting daddy, so he can be held and nursed like a little baby. It all sounds and 'is' totally bizarre, but not to the people doing RealLove. They are just led to believe that everyone else not doing RealLove are the crazy one's.
I am not sure what any of us can do to about exposing this organisation for what it truly is. How does one get a cult organisation out into the open so it can be publicly, professionally and openly scrutinised?